The New Zealand Made Cyborg Named Emily

As I get more comfortable with my role as a teacher I have started to play wee trickster games with my favorite classes. Especially my younger classes who are outrageous and crazy and love to be tricked and taken on long wild walks down the garden path. I love playing with their minds because eventually when they figure it out they scream in delight and get so worked up. Its the best kind of entertainment.

One of my most recent class room pastimes was convincing my rowdy class of eight year olds that I was not, in fact, Maggie Teacher but Maggie Teachers twin sister Emily who had recently flown into Korea to help out our school. For the first few seconds they sat staring at me, all fourteen heads cocked to one side inspecting every inch of me. Then the questions started. How old are you? Why do you look exactly the same as Maggie teacher? (because Emily and I are monozygotic twins of course!) How long are you staying for? Is Maggie coming back? Where is Maggie now? Can we go and see her? Can you speak any Korean? You are not really Emily are you? You are Maggie! Aren't you? TEACHER? TEEEEAAACCCHHEEER!! And then the screams of delight and semi terror began. It was excellent. And hilarious. I love watching as belief and disbelief flutter across their faces.

In another of my best classes I convinced them that I was not a human but a New Zealand made cyborg. That New Zealand was famous for producing top of the line educational teacher-cyborgs which were then shipped all over the world, predominantly to South Korea, China and Japan. One student asked me why a cyborg would be eating popcorn (as I was at the time) to which I responded that this was not popcorn, but polystyrene which kept the small engine in my chest running at optimum capacity. Do you have a heart teacher? One student asked. Of course not! I replied! I am a cyborg!!

I have been informed in a very serious manner by one of my classes that it is imperative I go to prison very very shortly, as I am a terrible liar and they just can't handle the injustice of me making such outrageous accusations and still being free to wander the school halls.